Sophie

February 2, 2005 to October 20, 2020

I met Sophie when she was just eight weeks old. Some dogs pick you right from the start, but not my girl. As the other puppies circled the food dish like tiny passengers about to board the next gravy train, Sophie sat like a princess on her owner’s lap. Normally, I would have gone for the more outgoing pup, but there was something about her. She had one googly eye, and a little pink spot on her nose, which matched the pink ribbon 'round her neck. I was hooked! The owner, Kathy Kent, had named her Joséphine, and she was not so eager to let my girl leave. Be it persistence or pure luck, I left with her that day. Being a good dog mamma, I went to the store and purchased a king-size bed for a little squirt, toys, food dish, collar and leash. Leash - what was I thinking? I would soon find out that I wasn’t leading her anywhere, nor would I be her leader; instead I would be quite the opposite and this small but mighty force would soon have me wrapped around her little paw.

Sophie did not bond with me at first, she was perhaps a little too young to leave her real mom. I almost let a lady that owned a daycare take her, but finding out how backwards she was, the woman passed her by. Somehow I needed to gain Sophie’s trust, respect and love, but how? My solution for loneliness and Sophs - a plastic bunny to serve as a surrogate mother! Dumb? Yes, but it worked, and she grew into her happy-go-lucky self; loved by all the neighborhood children and everyone she met. Sophie was on the way to becoming my heart dog. Like all new relationships, it took time to develop; time to learn who was the leader and who followed. I took Sophie to obedience school, but after one session they kicked us out. They informed me to return when she was older, but we never did. Truth be told, I like spontaneity; I like strong willed, happy-go-lucky people and my dogs the same. I allowed Sophie to develop and show her own character. She quickly took the leash by the teeth and led me. At three months of age, she won first place in the 2005, Michigan Week Parade. Senator Cameron Brown crowned Sophie the most adorable dog and to me, she was. I had two nicknames for Soph - Bozo (because of the way she pulled her ears upwards and out to the side) and Little Red. She was indeed charismatic!

There are few things in life more terrible than terminal illness. To those that know their death sentence, living out the remainder of their life can be terrifying. They say dogs don’t know that they’re dying, they only know life. In reality, they know only you and those that live within their pack. Transitional cell carcinoma is an aggressive cancer. It’s sad when humans develop it, and it’s sad when pets develop the cancer too. The word cancer can evoke a cloud of fear, instill a sharp pain in the heart and fog the mind. When I found out Sophie had TCC, it broke my heart. I was told that she had about two months to live, then it dropped to two weeks, then to mere days. Nothing the vet prescribed worked, the cancer continued to grow. On the outside, she looked good for her age. Armed with hope, faith and a lot of love, we were going to beat this disease. Many told me not to place a timestamp on life and I did my best not to do this. Mere days turned into six and a half months. We walked all summer long to the point I wore holes in the bottom and top of my shoes. Every night after dinner she would wait by her stroller to enjoy her nightly stroll. At first I wanted to create a bucket list and do all these grand things, but then I realized she tired more easily and grand could be simple; like stroller rides around the block, watching squirrels in the backyard and even lifting her in my arms to stalk them. I hate the phrase quality over quantity. We always want more time, but the sad thing is we don’t always get it. So make the most of what you have - time wise and finances for medication; you do your personal best; you be their advocate. When the alien (tumor), that lives inside your loved one, takes complete residency and life is no longer fun to live, then it’s time to say good night. Goodbyes are unwarranted, for excellent dogs never truly leave. They walk in the shadows of our memory and those pains in your heart are them wagging their tail, letting you know they loved you.

I have spent most of my life working in the educational field - teacher, sub teacher, interventionist. Sophie met many of my students on walks, and she traveled with me to various nursing homes as an outreach to those that could no longer enjoy life beyond the nursing home walls. Each person she encountered, she left with a smile on their face. I often called her the ambassador of love, because that is what dogs are - pure love. They do not judge; they simply accept you for who you are and give you peace. She especially gave peace of mind to me and my family. I’ve been through divorce, dealt with catastrophic trauma of a loved one after being severely burned in a fire, cared for two individuals on hospice, re-married, and during this entire time one little dog helped us all hold it together. How can a dog help one keep things in perspective? The answer is simple; they are the greatest shrinks around! They do not divulge your secrets or fears. They are man’s best friend.

Sophie was born 2/2/2005, and she blessed me with almost sixteen years of devoted friendship, and she became the daughter I never had. She passed away at the vet’s office in late Autumn, 10/20/2020. Sophie gave me a seasoned life; sprinkled with laughter and tears. She loved to play and open gifts. Soph was gentle and generous with her kisses. She also had the most adorable bark. I’m dogless now; very unusual for me, but I think I’m good with that. As I mentioned before, she went through a lot with me and she became my heart. I’m older too, and with the uncertainty of the times we live in, I’m not sure I want to bring another dog into the house. It’s my belief that if you allow yourself the company of a dog, you remain loyal until the end. We both started out with red hair and we both ended with snow mixed in. Raising a dog is like a rainbow. Puppies are the joy at one end, old dogs are the treasure at the other. Her leash still hangs on the hook in the basement stairwell, but I know life is about walking each other home; so someday she’ll return for that leash and walk me back home. “Grant that I may not: so much seek to be justified, as to console; to be obeyed as to understand; to be honored, as to love, for it is in giving ourselves that we heal; it is in listening that we comfort, and in dying that we are born to eternal life.”